It’s understandable if you retreat into yourself, throw on your comfiest sweatpants, and ignore the world when life gets tough. However, some people still find a way to remain kind even while nursing their own emotional bruises. How do they manage to stay compassionate when their hearts feel heavy?
Maybe it’s a mixture of grit, self-awareness, and the occasional well-timed joke. Some find that small moments of kindness not only help others but also help them navigate their own struggles. A special medal should be given to people who manage to balance their own emotions while staying present for others.
It’s possible to heal yourself while lifting others up along the way. Here are some of the ways people keep showing kindness, even when they’re hurting.
1. They Use Humor to Disarm Their Own Pain
When life gives you lemons, some people skip the lemonade and go straight to cracking jokes. Humor is like emotional bubble wrap—it doesn’t stop the fall, but it sure softens the landing. Those going through tough times often sprinkle in a little sarcasm or a well-placed quip.
It’s not just to lighten their own load but to ease the moment for everyone else too. Humor doesn’t cure the pain, but it puts it in a pair of clown shoes, making it just a bit easier to deal with.
2. They Turn to Small Acts of Thoughtfulness
Even when someone’s running on emotional fumes, they can still muster the energy for tiny acts of kindness. Holding the door open or tossing out a quick compliment—it’s like sprinkling humanity glitter everywhere.
They might not have the bandwidth for grand heroics, but these little gestures are like emotional Post-it notes saying, “Hey, I’m struggling, but I still believe in making someone’s day a smidge better.”
3. They Listen More Than They Speak
In tough times, some people turn into human confessional booths. Even if they’re not ready to spill their own feelings, they’ll happily play therapist-for-a-day, offering a top-notch listening ear. This kind of active listening lets others unload their baggage, making everyone feel a little lighter.
Listening isn’t just good for others– it’s self-care in disguise. By letting someone else do the talking, you can hit pause on your own worries and focus on being the problem solver instead of the one with all the problems.
4. They Keep Their Complaints to Themselves
We all need to vent sometimes, but some people, bless their hearts, manage to keep it together even when life’s a mess. Instead of airing their grievances like it’s the evening news, they take the high road, knowing everyone’s probably juggling their own chaos.
It’s not that they’re not struggling; they just know that they really don’t have to bring the house down, especially if everyone else is having a good time. Call it emotional resilience or top-tier adulting, but they’ve mastered the art of suffering in silence with style.
5. They Help Without Expecting Anything in Return
When people are going through personal struggles, it’s easy to focus inward, thinking about their own needs. However, some still manage to lend a hand when needed, even if they’re not in the best shape themselves.
They may offer to pick up groceries for a friend or help with a work project. These acts of selflessness show that they are willing to give, even when they could use the help themselves. It allows them to focus on someone else’s needs, which can, in turn, make their own problems seem a bit smaller.
6. They Don’t Hold Grudges
Holding onto resentment only increases their emotional burden, so they choose to forgive instead. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting—it means releasing the grip that negative emotions have on them. Being forgiven by someone who’s still hurting is one of the highest levels of kindness.
Forgiveness creates room for positivity and growth, not just for themselves but for the people they interact with. There isn’t a better way to free oneself from the mental and emotional weight of anger. This decision to forgive or move past conflicts makes it easier to remain open, approachable, and kind, even when life isn’t going as planned.
7. They Share Their Own Vulnerability
Some people choose to share their vulnerability when their heartaches are deep. They might talk openly about their struggles, allowing others to see their authentic selves. This isn’t for attention—it’s a way to let others know they’re not perfect and that it’s okay not to have everything figured out.
Sharing their pain creates a space where others feel comfortable doing the same. Vulnerability shows others that they’re not alone in their struggles and that it’s okay to experience hardship.
8. They Choose to Be Patient
Patience might be a virtue, but it’s in short supply when life feels like a dumpster fire. Still, some people manage to keep their cool with others, even when they’re ready to launch themselves into space to escape their own problems.
They get that emotional chaos isn’t a free pass to be a jerk, so they pause, listen, and respond like the grown-ups they are (or at least pretend to be). Practicing patience during tough times saves you from unnecessary drama, even when you’re barely holding it together.
9. They Accept Help When It’s Offered
Kindness doesn’t always come from giving—it also comes from receiving. People who are hurting may be reluctant to ask for help, but when it’s offered, they graciously accept.
By accepting help, they allow others to show kindness in return, creating a sense of mutual support. This exchange of help reinforces the idea that kindness is a two-way street and that it’s okay to lean on others when needed.
10. They Create Little Joyful Rituals
Even in the hardest times, some people find comfort in creating little moments of joy for themselves or others. Lighting a favorite candle, writing (and maybe burning) letters, brewing a special cup of tea, or making sure to call a friend for a quick laugh–these small rituals are a form of self-care and a way to keep kindness flowing.
These intentional moments, though small, have the power to make a big impact on both the giver and the receiver. They show that no matter how tough life gets, there’s always room for something sweet, a bit of calm, or a spark of happiness.
11. They Don’t Blame Others for Being Happy
It’s easy to get caught up in self-pity when life is tough, and it can be tempting to resent others for their happiness. But people who are hurting still find a way to celebrate the joy of others without making them feel guilty.
They understand that someone else’s happiness does not diminish their own struggles and that there is enough room in the world for everyone to feel their feelings. Rather than being bitter, they choose to share in the joy of others and spread kindness by being happy for them.
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I’m a Language and Literary Studies (Honors) graduate with 11 years of experience in magazine and blog writing and content creation. I’m passionate about storytelling for change and believe in the power of words to make a difference. My writing is thought-provoking, accessible, and engaging, focusing on the Psychology of human behavior, complex social issues, personal experiences, and the latest trends. I’m a wife and a Mom of three.
I’m a Language and Literary Studies (Honors) graduate with 11 years of experience in magazine and blog writing and content creation. I’m passionate about storytelling for change and believe in the power of words to make a difference. My writing is thought-provoking, accessible, and engaging, focusing on the Psychology of human behavior, complex social issues, personal experiences, and the latest trends. I’m a wife and a Mom of three.