Who doesn’t want to be thought of as attractive and alluring? Some people spend thousands of dollars to look “easier on the eyes”- from nose jobs to facelifts and Botox. But being attractive goes way beyond just a slimmer nose and longer eyelashes. Many agree that a good personality is better than a small waist, and there’s more to a person than the physical characteristics that can make them effortlessly highly appealing.
Recent research by the NationaI Institute of Health said that good conduct makes you attractive, meaning attraction is more about how we carry ourselves and treat others than our physical features in some cases. It may seem vain, but small things like smiling—whether we think our smile is pretty or not—and other intangible things like kindness and confidence speak volumes before you even utter a single word.
Here are the subtle yet powerful behaviors that increase your attractiveness and effortlessly draw people toward you.
1. Acts of Kindness
You may have the highest cheekbones in the city, but many people will see you as ugly if you’re unkind and rude. Being kind is a trait that will make you significantly more attractive, no matter how average your face may seem. People are drawn to those who show genuine kindness and compassion towards others.
Showing that you have a good heart and care about the well-being of others makes you stand out positively. Random acts of kindness are great, but making kindness your default setting is way better.
2. Displaying Confidence
Do you walk into a room as stealthily as possible, hiding your face with your palms, or stride in with your chin up like you belong there? Confidence is very attractive. It’s not about being the loudest person in the room but about the quiet assurance that you are comfortable in your own skin. This tells the world you believe in yourself and your abilities without needing to prove anything to anyone. It shows you are secure with who you are, even in vulnerability.
Confidence can be as simple as maintaining eye contact during conversations or expressing your thoughts without fear of judgment. People are naturally attracted to individuals who exude confidence, which indicates reliability and stability.
3. The Power of Humor
Ask any person in love what they love about their partner, and you’ll likely hear a lot of, “They make me laugh!” The ability to find things to laugh at shows that you don’t take yourself too seriously, which is always a plus. Humor also helps break down barriers and create a sense of connection.
There’s a lot of stress in the street today, and a little laughter is good for the soul. People love someone who can make them see the funny side of life. Whether it’s a clever comment or a funny observation, sharing a moment of laughter with someone can significantly boost your attractiveness in their eyes.
4. Empathy and Understanding
No one wants to be invisible, especially when they’re going through a hard time. Your empathy and understanding show you have high emotional intelligence, making others feel comfortable and drawn towards you. Empathy shows you can see things from someone else’s perspective and truly care about their feelings.
Empathetic people provide a supportive presence. When you empathize, you acknowledge someone’s feelings and validate their experiences. This genuine recognition can build stronger, more meaningful connections. Being someone people feel they can turn to in times of need elevates your appeal.
5. Being Authentic
There’s a lot of fakeness in the world today, with people putting their best foot forward and hiding their less attractive bits behind the newest filters. Being true to yourself and embracing your unique qualities can be incredibly attractive to others. People want to be around those who are genuine and authentic.
Trying to be someone you’re not can come across as insincere. Many people are looking for honest people, chin hairs and all. Embracing your quirks and imperfections shows confidence and self-acceptance, which are highly attractive traits.
6. Good Manners and Politeness
Social etiquette and good manners are virtues that are eroding slowly and steadily, and being polite makes you quite appealing. It shows that you respect others, are mindful of their feelings, and were raised well.
This simple act of politeness can make a big difference in how people perceive you and can make you stand out in a crowd. Being kind and considerate in your words and actions is a sure way to attract positive attention from those around you. As they say, people will remember how you made them feel.
7. Being a Good Listener
Do you listen to understand or just selectively listen to answer back? There is such a great attraction in someone who truly listens. When you genuinely listen to someone, you value their words and perspectives. Every relationship hinges on the listening skills of the people in it.
In a world where everyone wants to be heard, being a good listener can make you incredibly attractive to those around you. If you aren’t a good listener yet, don’t fret. Psychologists say listening is a powerful, and learnable virtue.
8. Maintaining a Positive Attitude
This cannot be emphasized enough—a positive attitude is magnetic, drawing people towards you. A positive attitude isn’t always about being happy but maintaining a hopeful perspective even in challenging situations. Resilience is appealing because it shows the strength of character and the ability to uplift those around you.
A positive attitude is contagious, and people want to be around those who can bring light into their lives. Maintaining positivity even when circumstances dictate you should be sulky and pessimistic tells people you are in control of your own happiness rather than relying on others (or on circumstances) for it.
9. Expressing Gratitude
Gratitude is a powerful emotion that enhances your attractiveness and will likely win you new friends. Gratitude toward others shows you appreciate their contributions and value them. A Harvard Health study showed that saying thank you makes you happier.
Grateful people are also more likely to have a positive outlook on life, which can be highly appealing to others. By expressing gratitude, you also attract more positivity into your life.
10. Generosity
Do people describe you as generous? It may explain why you have so many friends. Generosity isn’t just about giving away material things but also sharing time, knowledge, and attention. Showing a willingness to help and give freely without expecting anything in return makes you more attractive because it shows you as selfless.
People are naturally drawn to generous people because it shows they have a big heart and genuinely care for others. Being generous can make you more attractive to others and contribute to your personal growth and fulfillment.
11. Intellectual Curiosity
People continuously seeking to learn and grow tend to be more engaging and interesting. Intellectual curiosity suggests a depth of character and a willingness to explore the world’s complexities. It also shows a desire for self-improvement and personal growth, which can be highly attractive to others.
Additionally, being intellectually curious means being open-minded and willing to learn from others. This makes you approachable and creates opportunities for meaningful conversations and connections.
12. Being Supportive
Having someone in your corner who believes in you and supports you can be a game-changer. It’s the same for others. Supporting those around you and cheering them on shows that you care about their success and well-being.
Being supportive also means being there for someone when they need it most, which can strengthen your bond with them. This selfless act of support makes you more likable, attractive, and trustworthy.
13. Being Open-minded
There must be as many diverse opinions as there are people. You will always meet someone with differing opinions; openly disagreeing with them isn’t very attractive. Open-minded individuals are willing to consider different perspectives and ideas, enriching discussions with them and broadening their knowledge.
This willingness to understand and even challenge one’s own beliefs signifies a level of personal security and confidence that is deeply attractive. It encourages a culture of learning and growth, not just within oneself but also in the relationships we foster.
14. Consistency
Are you the person who blows hot and cold, or can people set their clocks by you? Consistency in your actions and behaviors builds trust and reliability. Being consistent shows that you are dependable, making you more attractive as someone who can be counted on not to waiver in commitment and character.
Inconsistency, on the other hand, can be a red flag for others, making them unsure and hesitant to form deeper connections with you. By being consistent in your words and actions, you become someone others can rely on and trust.
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I’m a Language and Literary Studies (Honors) graduate with 11 years of experience in magazine and blog writing and content creation. I’m passionate about storytelling for change and believe in the power of words to make a difference. My writing is thought-provoking, accessible, and engaging, focusing on the Psychology of human behavior, complex social issues, personal experiences, and the latest trends. I’m a wife and a Mom of three.